Be Strong and Courageous

Raising money for ministry can be a daunting procedure. It can be particularly daunting if it involves visioning, preparing and planning for a major building project and then raising the money and seeing the project to completion. Ministers are generally not prepared for this, and by and large, neither are church leaders. It is sad therefore when plans for urgently needed facilities are shelved and put in the too hard basket.

The bible has a description of the preparations for a major building project: Solomon’s temple, in 1 Chronicles 28 and 29. It is easy to miss this as the books of Chronicles are not the ones that we normally go to for quiet time reading. I remember that when I entered Moore College to train for the ministry nearly fifty years ago, we first year students were almost immediately required to read and be examined on 1 and 2 Chronicles, probably because the college was aware that our knowledge of these books would be primitive.

1 Chronicles 29 contains quite detailed instructions about how King David raised resources for the temple. It is very practical and contains the magnificent theology of God’s ownership of our possessions and how David and the elders personally led the process of raising the money. Yet the preceding chapter, 1 Chronicles 28 also contains some vital information.

Here David

1. Summons the officials to meet in Jerusalem.
2. Reminds them that God had chosen David as king and has chosen Solomon his son to build the temple.
3. Charges the elders to follow God’s commands.
4. Directs Solomon to serve God wholeheartedly.
5. Gives Solomon detailed instructions about personnel and associated rooms for the temple that the Spirit had revealed to him.
6.  Instructs about ministry of the priests and levites and the gold and silver required.
7. Gives Solomon a charge to be strong and courageous. This is because God himself will be with Solomon, the priests and levites are ready and skilled craftsmen and obedient people are waiting for orders.

The charge to be strong and courageous appears elsewhere in scripture where a daunting task is before the people. It is associated with the command to rise up and enter the promised land. Moses, in Deuteronomy 31:6&7, exhorts the people to be strong and courageous. Similarly, God repeats the exhortation to Joshua after Moses’ death, in Joshua 1: 6,7&9. The people are not to be afraid. They are to keep God’s word and be confident of his presence.

I do not see these verses as an invitation to go off half-baked into some major project.  David was confident that God had spoken to him and that he was following God’s command. He also had the support of the leaders and the people. Extensive plans had been given and made for the carrying out of the enterprise. David led the charge himself in raising the required resources. It was now up to young Solomon to complete the task. It was in this context that ‘be strong and courageous’ is given.

So, if you know there is a vital ministry need and you believe that through prayer and the counsel of godly, wise advisers, that this is God’s will and you have developed a well thought out plan of action and have the support of your congregation, be strong and courageous and complete the task for the extension of God’s kingdom.

For more details about how David raised the resource in 1 Chronicles 29, see my book, Giving Generously. https://givinggenerously.com/

The Importance of Trust

Some years ago, when I led a giving campaign to raise funds for a new building at Figtree Anglican, the congregation gave magnificently. There was one gift that quite amazed me. A person in their early to mid-twenties, who was part of our young adult cohort, pledged a sum that took my breath away. Had that person given one tenth of that amount I would still have thought it was a substantial amount for a person at that stage of life. It had quite a humbling effect on me. I remember thinking to myself. ‘With such people in my congregation I must never ever betray their trust by carelessly handling the truth, improperly using the money or exhibiting some egregious moral failing.’ I don’t by any means wish to give the indication that I had no flaws or made no mistakes. Rather it just strengthened in me a desire to act honourably during life and ministry despite the pressure that pastoring can bring.

Trust is crucial in raising resources for ministry. If the people feel money will be wasted, spent for purposes not intended, or even worse, embezzled, you can kiss goodbye to any thoughts of a fruitful giving campaign.

The church that I currently attend has a Christmas appeal for a missionary building and ministry project in Southeast Asia. The ministry provides employment training for young women who have been rescued from sex trafficking. Without such help their impoverished families often resell them into the same appalling situations. The aim of the project is to double the space for training and provide safe childcare for the children of the young women. Further it is not simply a secular endeavour. The girls are told about the love of Christ that has motivated this ministry.

I asked fellow congregational member, Jill Lovell, a former missionary and current PhD student working in the area of Trust in Not-for-profits, what were some drivers that would make her support the church and specifically this project. This was just a casual conversation, not an in-depth interview but two words came immediately to her mind.

The first was ‘transparency’. She knew exactly where the money was going and what it was to be used for. Members of the ministry team regularly visit the site and bring back compelling videos of the work. In the past, earlier beneficiaries of the ministry had visited the congregation. So, we all felt a very personal connection.  Money would be spent where we were told it would be spent, and it would have life-changing results.

Her second point was ‘proximity’. This is particularly important for church leaders because it can enhance the fruit of any giving campaign or cripple it. If I give to anyone of a number of worthwhile charities, most times I have no intimate knowledge of the people involved. I don’t know the president of a wildlife organization, for example. But in the local church I generally do know the ministers. I see them every week. I listen to them preach. I experience their ministry in times of crisis. I know if they are punctual or habitually late to meetings, if they are prone to exaggeration, whether they are even tempered or given to fly off the handle. In a myriad of little personal ways, I form impressions, positive or negative, that will dictate whether and how much I will support the next church appeal.

I am pleased to note that on both of these points our church gets a big tick, and it is no surprise that the appeal generated a phenomenal response.

As someone who was in the trenches in ministry for twenty years, I know how stressful the work is and how easy it can be to be tempted to cut corners. This piece is simply a reminder that the scriptures hold us to the highest standards of integrity that will breed the trust that bears fruit.

For more on raising resources for ministry, see my book Giving Generously. givinggenerously.com/buy-the-book-2/

Deep Seek and Giving Generously

There has been a considerable amount of publicity recently given to a new Artificial Intelligence Application developed in China, called Deep Seek. My skill set in this area is negligible but I asked my son, who has great technical competence for his opinion. He in turn asked Deep Seek to review my book. This was the result.

Giving Generously by Irvine is a book that focuses on the principles and practices of generosity, particularly from a Christian perspective. The book appears to be a guide for individuals and organizations seeking to cultivate a lifestyle of giving, rooted in biblical teachings and practical advice.

Key Themes and Takeaways:

1. Biblical Foundations of Generosity: The book likely emphasizes the importance of generosity as a core value in the Christian faith, drawing on scripture to illustrate how giving is not just a financial act but a spiritual discipline.
2. Practical Guidance: It probably offers actionable steps for individuals and churches to integrate generosity into their daily lives, including budgeting, charitable giving, and supporting community initiatives.
3. Impact of Generosity: The book may explore how generosity transforms both the giver and the recipient, fostering a sense of community, purpose, and fulfillment.
4. Stories and Testimonies: It might include real-life examples or testimonies of people who have experienced the joy and blessings of living generously.
5. Challenges and Misconceptions: The book could address common barriers to generosity, such as fear, scarcity mindset, or cultural attitudes, and provide encouragement to overcome them.

Target Audience:

• Christians seeking to align their financial practices with their faith.
• Church leaders and organizations looking to inspire their congregations to give.
• Anyone interested in exploring the spiritual and practical aspects of generosity.

Strengths:

• The book seems to combine theological insights with practical advice, making it accessible and applicable to a wide audience.
• Its focus on generosity as a holistic lifestyle, rather than just a financial transaction, is likely to resonate with readers.

Potential Limitations:

• The book’s strong Christian perspective may limit its appeal to readers outside that faith tradition.
• Depending on the depth of its financial advice, readers looking for highly detailed or secular strategies for giving might find it less useful.

Overall Impression:

Giving Generously appears to be a thoughtful and inspiring resource for those looking to deepen their understanding of generosity from a faith-based perspective. If you’re interested in aligning your giving practices with biblical principles or seeking motivation to live more generously, this book could be a valuable read.

Wow this has given me some food for thought and ideas about improvement. But this is Deep Seek’s opinion. Why not buy the book and make your own judgement?

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The Measure of Generosity

Many years ago, I was listening to a sporting event that was also promoting a telethon. The presenters were commenting on the totals and urging everyone to get behind this worthy cause. Suddenly the commentators overflowed with praise for a well-known mega-rich family who had given a multimillion-dollar gift. They were effusive in their praise. They were gushing. Now it was a large gift, and I am sure that the cause was extremely pleased to get it. But I couldn’t help pondering just how generous it was.  Many ordinary church members would give $1,000 to $2,000 to a mission appeal and there would be no fanfare, but in terms of their wealth the proportion might be similar. Now I mean no disrespect to the original family. They may have been giving secretly and generously to many other causes, but it just made me pause to consider what actually is the measure of generosity.

I believe Jesus gives the answer. Luke records, chapter 21:1-4, the famous story of the widow’s mite. That is the title familiar to generations of readers of the King James Bible. Jesus observed some rich people depositing large sums into the temple treasury, whereas a poor widow placed in two mites. The word mite translates the Greek lepta, a small copper coin. For the scientifically minded there is a class of small atomic particles known as leptons to distinguish them from heavier particles. The most familiar lepton is the electron. Jesus was not giving a physics lesson. His point was that the widow’s gift was actually more substantial than that of the rich because while they had given much their wealth was substantial, but the widow gave out of her poverty with nothing over.

I often thought of this incident in my former parish of Figtree. One of my parishioners was a widow living on the pension. She had experienced considerable sadness in her family. However, far from being embittered, she was one of the most servant hearted, faithful, hospitable and generous people I know. She was greatly loved by all who knew her. She founded a Sunday School in the branch church and served on the parish council. In fact, when I proposed that we introduce the pledging system described in my book Giving Generously, (givinggenerously.com/buy-the-book-2/) she was one of the first to support the proposal. She had a heart full of the love of God.

When I wrote the book I included a chapter on teaching Generosity principles. But subsequent to publication I realized I had left one principle out. Since I live in such an affluent society this principle always makes me somewhat uncomfortable as it is areal challenge to be more generous. The principle is that ‘what we have left is the measure of generosity’.

Gospel Patroness

In 2013 John Rinehart wrote a stimulating little book called Gospel Patrons about wealthy individuals who used their financial resources to fund the ministries of famous Christian leaders. The patrons are rarely acknowledged but their generosity has had lasting influence. Another such person is Margaret Baxter nee Charlton. Margaret (1636-1681) married the famous C17 English puritan Richard Baxter (1615-1691) in 1662 despite there being a twenty-year gap in their ages. His literary output was so large that some called him ‘scribbling Dick’.  With Margaret he enjoyed a very happy union.

She had been born into wealth, but Richard was raised in humble circumstances. In ministry while Richard had had security and positions of influence, the Restoration of Charles II in 1660 meant that for most of the rest of his life, he was in dire financial straits and often persecuted by ecclesiastical authorities for his nonconformity.

Margaret became a gospel patroness using her money to support his ministry in a range of ways. She funded chapels and rented rooms where her husband could preach. She supported him when his persecution was most acute often living with him in dwellings that were far below the station her class would naturally accept. She gave the home financial stability when her husband was not permitted to earn an income and gave him the means to undertake his prolific writing output.

She exhibited magnificent generosity to the poor supporting them and establishing schools to pay for the education of their children. Margaret also undertook to financially support others, such as a certain preacher Mr Seddon and his family when Seddon was cast into prison for gospel ministry. In all of this she became an unlikely flag bearer for women’s public ministry in an era where women were far less prominent.

Sadly, she died relatively young, probably of cancer. She followed her master, Jesus who the apostle Peter describes, among many other things, as one who ‘went around doing good.’ (Acts 10:38). More importantly her generosity sprang from a total commitment to Christ. As a teenager she had been much interested in the life of the world and disliked a piety that appeared too serious. But that all changed in the late 1650s under Baxter’s preaching in Kidderminster and she soon came to a robust commitment to Jesus. This was the well spring of her new character.

On her death Baxter reflected on her life and his sorrow in a short work entitled A Breviate of the Life of Margaret Baxter which is available to download through a simple google search. My engagement with this material has come by reading A Grief Sanctified by J.I. Packer which discusses Baxter’s marriage to Margaret and the principles that made it so strong.

Margaret stands as an example to all of us, as a person totally committed to Christ and one who used her earthly goods in His service. Everyone can be stimulated by her generosity but especially those who have more of this world’s goods than they possibly need. If that is you, look for opportunities to become a gospel patron or patroness.

For more about raising resources for ministry, see my book Giving Generously https://givinggenerously.com/

Resourcing the Tabernacle

Guidance for raising resources for God’s work can be found in numerous places in the bible. Some of those valuable references are in sections that are often rarely read or skimmed over. In my youth I remember reading and hearing stories in the book of Exodus about the burning bush, the plagues on Egypt, the Passover, the crossing of the sea, the manna in the wilderness and the Ten Commandments and the episode of the apostasy in the desert. But then I would lose interest in details of the sanctuary and priesthood and would jump chapters, even whole books, to get into the action material of Joshua. Yet in the latter section of Exodus is a fascinating account of the raising of resources for the tabernacle. It is given in two sections.

First there is the command to raise the resources (Ex 25: 1-9). Then secondly, after the sorry incident of the golden calf the actual carrying out of the commands is recorded Ex 35:4-36:7. There is much to absorb in these sections that are not our favourite quiet time reflections. And there are a number of principles for raising money for ministry that can be discerned. These are just a few.

1. Moses as the leader gets the job of communicating the command (Ex 25:1). Raising resources is simply part of the leadership role. Ministers can’t dodge it.
2. The appeal is made vigorously but not coercively. The material was to be received from each man ‘whose heart prompts him to give (Ex 25:2).’ This principle is one of the important takeaways here. It is repeated again and again. When the people bring their offering, it is ‘everyone who is willing’ (Ex 35:1, 21, 26, 29). There is no place in any Christian raising of money or resources for manipulation, coercion or tricky and underhanded dealings.
3. The work had a divine purpose. It was to be a sanctuary so that God would dwell among his people. When people today raise money for ministry it is vital there is a spiritual purpose. When Figtree Anglican Church built a new auditorium we tried to make this very clear. We asked every member to write on a piece of paper someone who they would be praying for that God would save. We then collected the names, placed them in a box and interred it underneath the spot where the pulpit would be. This ‘burial’ was filmed and showed to the congregation to demonstrate that the building was to advance God’s kingdom, not merely an architectural fantasy.
4. God’s hand must be in the project. In Exodus the Lord gives Moses explicit instructions on the precise details of the tabernacle (Ex 25:9). I must confess I wish we, at Figtree, had such precise direction. We had a complicated site and eventually three different architects to get a final design. However, we did have astonishing confirmation on multiple occasions that God’s hand was with us as seemingly insurmountable obstacles melted away. It goes without saying that seeking God’s leading in prayer is crucial.
5. Congregational buy-in is essential. After the punishment of the Israelites after the apostasy with the Golden Calf it is perhaps not surprising that the people were obedient and participated in the making of the tabernacle. The Israelites responded as a community, bringing materials, offerings, using gifts and talents, training others. You can get a sense of this sort of engagement in the movie Witness where the whole Amish community bands together to build a barn. Churches that have a large tradie demographic often can reduce the cost of a project by such donated expertise. At Figtree we weren’t too well represented in this segment and the build was done by outside professionals. But there was a wonderful involvement by many talented people who gave expertise in sound, lighting, project management, finances, liaising with architects and on and on and on. Without such involvement and alignment from the people who will give the money and make the project happen, such an enterprise will invariably fail.
6. As a preacher I have always been drawn to the conclusion of the campaign (Ex 36:6-7). The people responded with great generosity to the extent that they brought more than was needed and so Moses told them to cease. Perhaps it is a preacher’s fantasy but I have always relished imaging a giving campaign where I could stand up before my congregation and say, ‘Stop! Stop giving! We have enough. We don’t need any more!’ As Buddy Holly sang, ‘Now that’ll be the day!’

For more on raising resources for ministry see my book Giving Generously. https://givinggenerously.com/

Need Money for your ministry. Ask your friendly Robot.

Just for general interest I decided to ask AI about raising money for ministry and so I typed

‘How do you raise money in churches 1000 words’ into ChatGPT to see what it would say. This was the result.

Raising money in churches is essential for maintaining facilities, supporting ministries, and serving the community. Here are some effective strategies to consider:

1. Traditional Offerings and Tithes

Regular Collections

Regular collections during services remain a primary source of income. Emphasize the importance of tithing and regular giving in sermons and communications.

Tithing Education

Educate the congregation on the biblical basis for tithing. Use scriptures and personal testimonies to illustrate the impact of tithing on the church and individual lives.

2. Special Fundraising Campaigns

Capital Campaigns

For large projects like building renovations or new constructions, launch capital campaigns. Clearly communicate the vision, goals, and timeline. Use brochures, presentations, and meetings to keep everyone informed.

Pledge Drives

Organize pledge drives where members commit to giving a certain amount over a period. This helps in planning and ensures a steady flow of funds.

3. Events and Activities

Bake Sales, Rummage Sales, and Car Washes

These activities not only raise funds but also foster community spirit. Encourage all age groups to participate and contribute.

Dinners and Auctions

Host dinners, auctions, and galas. Sell tickets, solicit donations for auction items, and provide an enjoyable experience. Local businesses often support such events through sponsorships or donations.

4. Online Giving and Digital Tools

Online Donation Platforms

Set up online giving options on the church’s website. Platforms like PayPal, Venmo, and specialized church giving apps make it easy for members to donate anytime.

Text-to-Give

Implement text-to-give services. This allows members to donate via text messages, making it quick and convenient, especially for younger, tech-savvy congregants.

5. Grants and Sponsorships

Religious and Community Grants

Research and apply for grants from religious organizations and foundations. Many offer funding for specific projects, programs, or general support.

Corporate Sponsorships

Seek sponsorships from local businesses. Offer recognition in church bulletins, websites, and events in return for their support.

6. Merchandise Sales

Church Branded Items

Sell branded items like T-shirts, mugs, and calendars. These not only raise funds but also promote church identity and unity.

Books and Media

If the church produces books, music, or other media, sell these items. Highlight the spiritual and educational value to encourage purchases.

7. Monthly Giving Programs

Sustained Giving

Encourage members to join monthly giving programs. Regular, smaller donations can be more manageable for members and provide a steady income for the church.

8. Legacy Giving

Planned Giving

Educate the congregation about including the church in their wills or estate plans. Planned giving can provide significant support for the church’s future.

9. Crowdfunding

Online Campaigns

Use crowdfunding platforms like GoFundMe for specific projects or emergencies. Share the campaign through social media and email to reach a wider audience.

10. Volunteer and In-Kind Contributions

Time and Skills

Encourage members to volunteer their time and skills. This can reduce costs for the church and involve more people in its activities.

Goods and Services

In-kind donations like food for events, materials for projects, or professional services can be as valuable as monetary contributions.

Implementation Tips

Clear Communication

Communicate clearly and regularly about the church’s financial needs, goals, and the impact of contributions. Use sermons, newsletters, social media, and personal testimonies to keep the congregation informed and engaged.

Transparency

Be transparent about how funds are used. Provide regular updates and financial reports to build trust and demonstrate accountability.

Gratitude

Show appreciation for every contribution, big or small. Personal thank-you notes, public acknowledgments, and recognition events can foster a culture of generosity.

Prayer and Faith

Emphasize the spiritual aspect of giving. Encourage members to pray about their contributions and trust in God’s provision.

Leadership Example

Church leaders should lead by example. When leaders are visibly committed to giving, it inspires the congregation to follow suit.

Conclusion

Raising money in churches requires a multifaceted approach that combines traditional methods with modern tools and techniques. By fostering a culture of generosity, clearly communicating needs and goals, and showing appreciation, churches can effectively raise the funds needed to support their mission and serve their communities.

Rod’s Comment

There is quite an extensive list here. I have seen most of them attempted in many churches. However the theological undergirding and methods of communicating and asking are absent. For more on these see my book Giving Generously. https://givinggenerously.com/

Ask for It

In a former post I related the story of my lovely daughter-in-law Natalie who was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer last year. ( Prayer for Healing https://givinggenerously.com/prayer-for-healing/). At time of writing Natalie is doing as well as possible for someone with her illness but we continue to pray.

Natalie and her family have decided to take a take a holiday to London in August. Now Natalie has a clever mother, Kate, as you will see. Under Kate’s direction Adam wrote a letter.

Dear Queen

My name is Adam Irvine. I am seven years old.  I live in Tarrawanna Australia. Sorry to hear the king is unwell. My mum is unwell like the king. We are coming to London in August/ September. We visit the Palace to see inside and maybe visit you both. Please it would be a wonderful surprise for my mum. Please take care of each other

Adam Irvine.

Some short time later Adam received this reply.

Thank you very much for your lovely letter. I was sorry that your mother is unwell, but I do hope that you will have a wonderful time in London in August.

I have asked my office to be in touch with you to arrange for you to visit Buckingham Palace as a surprise for your mother!

Best wishes

Camilla R

 The next day Adam received a follow up communication from Queen Camilla’s staff confirming the invitation. Natalie said that her mum had always taught the family when she was growing up: “If you don’t ask you don’t get”.

Kate would not see herself as some sort of prophetess but her words have a certain similarity to those of Jesus who said in another context:

‘Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you’.                   Matt 7:7

It certainly takes a certain amount of boldness to write to the Queen, and I know I would not have thought to do it.

However this principle of asking is more than an open sesame to Buckingham Palace. It is true in scripture as well. There are at least three significant times where biblical leaders address God’s people and ask them to support God’s work.

1. Building the temple required an enormous sum and while David does not build the temple himself, he does raise the money. I Chronicles is not necessarily one of the go-to books of the bible for devotions, but it contains some inspiring material. You can read of the upfront, bold way David addresses the issue of money for the temple in 1 Chronicles 29.
2. Moses had a similar problem in raising resources for building the tabernacle. He approached the issue in the same forthright way. His request was so fruitful that he even had to ask people to stop giving because they had oversupplied the need. Ex 25:1-9 & Ex 35:4-36:5
3. In the New Testament, believers in Jerusalem were in dire financial distress and the apostle Paul devoted space in a number of his letters to bringing this need before other followers of Jesus. His instructions and manner of asking in 2 Corinthians 8 & 9 have given subsequent generations a model of the theology and practice of asking for support for Christian ministry.

So don’t be backward in laying the financial needs of the ministry before your congregation. Remember the principle, ‘if you don’t ask, you don’t get’. Kate has spoken so it must be true!! And even more, remember Jesus and ‘ask, seek and knock’.

For more on raising resources for ministry, see my book: Giving Generously.  https://givinggenerously.com/buy-the-book-2/

Gold in them thar’ hills

There was a 1931 song by Frankie Marvin about the urge to go prospecting in California: ‘There’s gold in them thar hills’. The yellow ore is there and all you have to do is go out and get it. I suspect some of our major retailers work on a similar line: There’s gold in them thar purses.

Recently I decided to purchase a new pair of long cargo pants to wear in winter. My wife and I embarked on a shopping expedition to a major department store in the Brisbane CBD. I really had no idea what price to expect but I was about to find out. I examined the offering on one table where the price tag was around $ 250. I gulped. Surely that could not be correct! So I moved on to another brand on another table where the price was over $500. I was astonished. Who buys this stuff?

My wife pointed out that a couple of stores up the mall was a different shop that may be more promising. However, on our way out I passed a rack of designer jeans, the type where material is ripped and proudly displays the resulting holes. I saw a tag saying ‘Reduced’ and paused to see the bargain. Yes it was reduced from an original price of $1465 to the fabulous steal of $1019. I kid you not! I went away thinking I was obviously very old and very much out of touch. Soon we entered a store close by where I was able to purchase a perfectly satisfactory pair of long cargo pants for $29.95. It wasn’t a fashion accessary but then I am not a clothes horse. The other department store must only cater to the gold in bulging wallets.

The backdrop to this story is that I hear repeatedly that people are doing it financially very tough in our current economic environment. Petrol, power bills, rents, groceries are all sky rocketing and putting enormous pressure on households. Politicians are incredibly sensitive on this subject as clergy can be. So in such times ministers can be very nervous about appealing for resources for ministry and just hope giving will magically get better.

Yet while financial hardship is certainly around in our congregations, it is not the whole story. There are also many people who are not financially stretched. The music icon Taylor Swift recently visited our shores and I read of one fan from Adelaide who outlaid $10,000 to see all seven shows. I googled to find how cruise ship numbers are going post Covid and what immediately hit my eye was the heading: Cruise Bookings hit record levels.

Thus I believe ministers should not let the gloomy headlines paralyse them from casting a compelling vision for the church and asking people to support it. Notice I say cast a compelling vision not complaining about the latest financial black hole.

 By all means acknowledge that money is very tight for some people. You might consider saying something like:

‘I understand that in this congregation with prices spiralling out of control that some of you are stitched to the limit and you are already giving generously as much as you can. I get that. So thank you for what you are doing and don’t feel obliged to do more at this time. But there will be some of you who do have resources. You’ve just got a raise. Great Aunt Sarah remembered you in her will. The stock market has shone favourably on you, your business is humming or your super is doing very well and you can give generously again to further the ministry of the gospel here. If you are someone like that then I am asking you to give even more generously now.

So offer to help those who are struggling and ask those who are not to give generously. Give for a holy cause rather than holey jeans!

For more on raising resources for ministry see my book: Giving Generously. https://givinggenerously.com/buy-the-book-2/

Fifty Two Years and Counting

Helen and I have recently celebrated fifty two years of marriage. It has prompted me to reflect on marriage in general and our marriage in particular. Many years ago, in 1995, we visited the then famous Crystal Cathedral in Los Angeles, where I was attending two weeks of seminars in Church Growth and Preaching.  Wandering around the campus I chanced into a back office for some forgotten purpose. My attention was drawn to a large sign on the wall. It read something like: The Top Twenty Factors to bring happiness in your Life. I will always remember the first one at the top of the list.

  “Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.”

I have subsequently discovered by the miracle of the internet, that the quotation comes from a book, P.S. I Love You by H. Jackson Brown Jnr. I can’t verify the statistics. However I do believe its general principle. Of all the crucial decisions in life, this decision is of the highest gravity.

I have repeated this saying many times in subsequent years and reflected at length on how such decisions get made.  Despite the inevitable ups and downs, of which there were many, I believe our marriage has been highly fruitful and successful. We have supported each other through the ebbs and flows of life. Yet we made this decision when we were incredibly young and with much growing and maturing to do. I was two months over twenty three and Helen was a few hours off nineteen. We were at an age when we didn’t really know ourselves, and so it was almost impossible to fully reveal who we were to each other.

There are many reasons why our marriage has worked but a foundational one was that we both believed at a very deep, existential level in keeping our promises. That concept pertains to every area of life but it particularly refers to the promises made in marriage which are about as important and sacred as a promise can be. So from the very earliest discussions that we started to have about our relationship’s being permanent, we believed in the sanctity of marriage. Later, as we progressed in maturity, we both came to understand the real basis of marriage is the commitment we made to each other. I read quite a number of modern secular books about marriage and while some of them are very helpful the idea of promises and commitment is almost completely absent.

In the old Anglican 1662 prayer book service, when the man concludes his vows to his intended, he says,

and thereto I plight thee my troth.

 To ‘plight a troth’ is an archaic way of saying, to make a covenant. The word covenant is the Hebrew term that describes an agreement made between two parties and a marriage is one such agreement. The Hebrew idiom is actually to ‘cut’ a covenant. The 1662 Anglican marriage service is the one from which many protestant marriage services are derived, and is the departure point for modern, secular services. It has a robust covenantal structure, containing a promise (the vow), the swearing of an oath, a sign (the ring) and made before witnesses, (God and the congregation). I labour this point because in later years when I was preparing young couples for marriage, I specifically taught them this covenantal form. I also emphasized that they would affirm their promises with the words, “I will” rather than the popular but inadequate, “I do”. This is because the promise is for the rigours of the future. It is not merely an affirmation of what a starry eyed couple may feel today.  My reason was that it is crucially important to have a firm idea of what marriage is, rather than some vague understanding that it is a flimsy bond of love that can disappear like a transient vapour, as soon as the frantic, hormonal coupling evaporates, and real life descends.

Many years later we went to a Marriage Weekend designed to strengthen couples’ relationships. One of the exercises we were given was to draw our marriage. That was an unusual but helpful task as it made us ponder our relationship from a different perspective. We ended up drawing ourselves as trapeze artists cavorting on the high wire with a strong safety net beneath. The high wire was our life with all its thrills and spills. The strong safety net was our life-long promise to each other that we were committed to keeping.

So for those intending to marry, please choose ever so carefully. And for those on the journey, on the high wire please secure your safety net.