Approaching Generous Donors for a large Gift
Approaching a Generous Donor for a large Gift
While it is important that all members of the church support the ministry and not rely on one or two very large donors, it is also certain that there will be some projects whose costs are substantial. Such projects may well require the support of successful business people or those who have otherwise been able to attract a considerable portion of this world’s goods. A project such as a new building may be financially so large that even a group of the most generous average givers will not have the funds to guarantee its successful conclusion.
The question that arises is simply, ‘How does a pastor approach a wealthy person and ask them for a significant donation?’ Most pastors are not trained in such requests and can be very nervous about asking. I certainly was. I recently asked Jack, a very successful, entrepreneurial and generous businessman, what were the criteria and motivations for his giving.
First it is important to note that Jack and his wife Jane are both very committed Christians and do not have to be convinced of the biblical value of generosity. Jack loves his church and finds great blessing in the ministry. He considers his church as family and when his church has a need he wants to help. This is just the same with his biological family. People want to help their kids if possible. They certainly don’t resent it and when the church provides a similar connection and makes a request. Jack is biassed towards giving rather than being reluctant contributor. But remember Jack will have many people asking him to contribute.
Another huge issue is trust, particularly trust in his pastor. This is vital for clergy to remember. Of course, this would apply to most parishioners but is especially relevant when the church needs large gifts. Jack said that he receives many requests and can easily be made to feel he is just a ‘cash cow’, useful for the next appeal but ignored in the interim. Jack told me with some distaste that he went to a talk about giving on one occasion when the speaker got up and said, ‘our job is to fleece the flock before someone else does.’ Certainly, that is direct but it is also crass and appalling, lacking in any pastoral empathy and completely devoid of any biblical spirit. People like Jack may well have accumulated a considerable slice of this world’s goods and certainly need to heed the biblical warning to the rich. However, those in business have almost certainly taken entrepreneurial risks and often work under a crushing strain of deadlines, staff issues, currency fluctuations, threats of litigation, and the possibility of bankruptcy that most of us don’t imagine. They, possibly more than most, need the empathy of a genuine concerned pastor.
However, Jack has not gotten to his present position by wasting his time and frittering his efforts away. He is focussed by nature on achieving outcomes and doing what he says he is going to do which is a hallmark of business success. Thus, when he or other like him give, they want to know that their gift is not being frittered away. So clear and timely communication is vital. In the old snail mail days, I used to write a letter each quarter to those who had given to the ministry at my church. I would always thank them for support and give them an update on how the projects they had supported, were progressing. This is particularly important with business people, who live and breathe in the world of key performance indicators. Forget this step and you may as well forget receiving a second donation.
When approaching someone like Jack, always approach him (or her) personally. An email will not suffice. It is also almost always the job of the senior minister. As Jack crisply put it, ‘I want to see the boss not the monkey’. Jack explained to me that when confronted with a difficult issue with a business deal, he will often ring the CEO of the opposite company, and they will sort out the issues promptly, boss to boss, man to man, and then let the staff work out the details. So, pastors, go yourself. Take a trusted advisor by all means but don’t simply send a staff member or lay person.
The other point that Jack made was to include the person’s spouse in the meeting. Jack said that his wife Jane participates in all their financial decisions and while she is not particularly connected with that side of the business, he deeply trusts her instincts and if she is apprehensive about a deal or a gift he does not proceed. So, it is far better to have the wife or husband in the room hearing the proposal firsthand.
I appreciate that this kind of ministry does not come easily to pastors, but it is an area where you can learn and grow and boldly ask the generous donors with whom you have built up a preexisting relationship. If they accept the meeting they are far more likely to say yes than say no. For more on this sensitive topic see my book Giving Generously. https://givinggenerously.com/